Good Morning, delegates to yet another faction bloodbath in Brighton. With this first PFLCPSA Conference Communiqué you will receive a completely free Polish flag to keep for your very own; the PFLCPSA theme for this year's Conference is Poland (see over for more details) and delegates will be expected to wave their free Polish flags at the following times: a) to call for reference back, b) to call for tellers or a card vote, c) whenever the President speaks, particularly to announce an election result, d) during the Polish debates later in the week and e) whenever Ray Alderson is sober.
Delegates will know that the long awaited Presidential election is to be announced this morning. Right-minded citizens will of course realise that Mrs. Losinska has been re-elected for a third term of office by a massive majority. However, mischievous elements have been spreading the following lies: the ever popular Len Julius Caesar Lever has in fact won the presidential election by a narrow margin, but the wicked time-servers of the Daylies group are pulling out all the stops to have the election nullified. Some have dared to suggest that the whole election will be fixed to pre-empt Caesar taking the throne, others suggest that Mrs. Losinska's bellboy Charlie Elliott has been given the task of ensuring that all goes smoothly.
To this end he has been complaining that Pat Hannaford, the CPSA HQ Office Manager, sent out the Election' Addresses before we were ready", and that in the event of an unfavourable result all the spoilt ballot papers will be called in with a view to nullifying the results The possible legal ramifications of all this maneuvering may help to explain the unusual presence in the Observers Gallery of Ben Hooberman, Mrs. L's personal solicitor and influential senior partner in the respected legal firm Lawfords. Advisers to Frank Chapple and Mrs. Losinska during tie 1976 case in which she took the CPSA to court, he can of course be relied upon to see that everything goes all right.
We are pleased to note that Mrs. L in pursuance of branch democracy has written to a number of branches dominated by Reds and their fellow travellers. She has pointed out that the oft-practiced custom of making a Branch Committee recommendations to the branch on which NEC candidate is to be supported or opposed is quite despicable and the antithesis of democracy, We are surprised that one branch, understood to be controlled by a dissident element of her own faction, the Daylies group, dared to write tack to Mrs. L protesting, and stating that they would be continuing this practice. We trust that Mr Hooberman will be contacting them soon.
POLISH UP YOUR POLISH
With renewed interest in affairs Polish both internationally and within the union, it was only natural that that the PFLCPSA should declare this Conference a Polish special. So each day the PFLCPSA Communiqué will contain an item of distinctly Polish flavour, ranging from useful phrases to Polish recipes, jokes and historical background. Today, we begin with a few Polish phrases that may be useful during Conference and the evening socialising, and we urge you to use them during debate:
DZlEN DOBRY CONFERENTZYA
Good morning Conference
DZIEN DOBRY PANI PRESYDENTYA
Good Morning Madam president
TUTAJ SA DOLAROW PAN ELLIS
Here are your dollars Mr. Ellis
GDZIE JEST RAY ALDERSON?
Where is Ray Alderson?
ON JEST POD STOLEM!
He is under the table!
CZY CHCIALBY PAN NA DANCING?
Will you have this dance?
NIE, PROSZE MNIE ZOSTAMIE W SPOKOJU!
No, leave me alone!
MESSAGE TO PFLCPSA SUPPORTERS:
Apologies to PFLCPSA supporters over the mix-up in venues for the PFLCPSA Rally on Saturday night, which led to numbers of you wandering the streets looking for a non-existent pub. However, there will be a PFLPCSA meeting this evening (and each Evening) immediately after the close of today's business in the Tea Bar, All PFLCPSA CADRES should attend.
WHO ARE THE PFLCPSA?
Some new delegates may not have heard of the Popular Front for the Liberation of the CPSA before attending this conference and seeing our daily communiqués.
The PFLCPSA was set up some years ago as an alliance of organisations who had agreed to fight on a common programme of action in the union. The largest organisation within the PFLCPSA is the Islamic Left and we support their aim of the twin path to the Most Holy God Allah through faithful prayer and the Jihad, or popular uprising of the masses.
The PFLCPSA support the following demands:
Support for the Islamic Left Annual Conference to be held in Beirut.
For the abolition of all forms of balloting and their replacement by the Popular Will of the Masses
End the stranglehold of the Catholic Action Group
For the abolition of the National Executive Committee and its replacement by a Revolutionary Command Council.
The CPSA is currently riddled by numerous boring factions and the PFLCSSA will fight unstintingly to expose their maneuvering and wheeler dealing through which they attempt to maintain their evil grasp over you, the ordinary member.
Why is Jenny Fosdal, doyenne of the Royal Albion bar, known as "Martini" Nothing to do with her drinking habits. It refers instead to the TV advert, which has the jingle as follows, Anytime, Anyplace, Anywhere. Gedditt ??!!
CREEP OF THE DAY
This coveted award today goes to the sententious beer swilling armchair socialist in charge of Civil Service Standing Orders, Roy Lewis.
WHAT KATIE DIDN'T
There is no substance whatever to the wicked rumours that have been circulating as follows:
Mrs.LOSINSKA has not announced the Presidential results and other results today because yesterday she was unable to contact her solicitor, Mr. Hooberman (the Electricians Friend) in case there has been a miscarriage of justice and the result is not all right.
As reported yesterday it has been confirmed that Julius Caesar Lever has won the presidential race. Although it is not yet confirmed, and despite vicious RED rumours, it is clear that the much respected Moderates have won an overwhelming majority on the incoming NEC. Mrs. L's chief toady and press lackey is wrong (as always) to predict a 28 - 0 right majority. As is Caledonian Drone Stuart MacLennan who is optimistically boasting of an 18 - 10 swing to the left. Garden gnome look-alike Frank Taylor is of course correct (as always) with his prediction of 22 - 6 to the right, but to the horror of failed gravy-trainers who do not feature on the list of successful candidates i.e. George Lobo and Frank Bonner.
In the Section Elections, the Daylies stooges have not been doing too well. This is the reason that the returning Officer Stuart Crowhurst has called in all the Section ballot papers with a view to exposing the electoral frauds of the despised Broad Left, who are aiming to have swept the board in all sections, displacing all but three of the Twilight group in both DE and DHSS. In MOD however, where democracy and justice prevail, the left have miserably failed in all but the Section Scrutineers election.
The following acts by current members of the NEC have been noted: IRENE DEVENISH so disliked the comments made about her in DE Section Conference by well-known Trotskyite Frank Sullivan that she demanded transcripts of the speech with a view to showing them to her solicitor and prosecuting for slander.
SYLVIA PARRY appeared somewhat tired and emotional at the MOD social on Sunday. Approaching a group of the MOD Terrorists faction who were minding their own business, she was heard to invite them to fuck off.
JOHN BARR of DNS Glasgow was allocated 6 motions to speak on at Conference. He approached John Ellis with a view to getting BRUNO to write 6 speeches for him, but was told to write them himself, he then wrote to the GS saying that he would be unable to attend Conference as the emotional strain would be too great. He is not at Conference claiming "ill-health" but he was at work last Friday, as usual.
LLOYD GEORGE HOLAN, outgoing Senior VP, when elected last year, surveyed the spacious lawn behind the Nightingale Lane HQ, He then rang up the office manager to order a suite of patio furniture and the conversion of the lawn into a putting green. These requests were refused. And at COCSU London No.1 Committee he told the astonished delegates last month that he was going on holiday for a month, as this was the only spare time I could get. In the middle of the pay campaign, George?
MARTIN GRIMSHAW at a previous CPSA Conference in Brighton was enterprising enough to take a day off for a day trip to France. We don't know what he said to the Branch at his report back. The PFLCPSA submitted an emergency motion calling an immediate blockade of ports and airports.
POLISH DUMPLINGS (Pierogi)
Ingredients: 150g buckwheat groats (kasha) /50g butter or fat/ 1 medium-sized onion, finely chopped/ 50g mushrooms, sliced/ salt and fresh ground black pepper, for the dough-400g flour/ 1 medium sized egg/ pinch of salt.
Filling: spread buckwheat in dry non-stick frying pan and place over a low heat. When strong buckwheat smell is apparent, gently stir for 10 mins to brown evenly. Stir in 225mls water and simmer gently for 15 mins, stir occasionally to fluff up grains. In another frying pan melt butter or fat over low heat and sauté onions and mushrooms until onion is transparent but not browned. Add these with butter or fat to buckwheat mixture and cook for 5 mins, remove from heat and season with salt and pepper.
Dough: combine flour, egg and salt with enough tepid water to make a smooth dough 3mm thick on lightly floured board. Use 7.5cm pastry cutter or glass to cut dough into rounds. Put 5ml filling in centre of each round, fold dough rounds into halves and crimp edges with prongs of fork. Put large saucepan of salted water to boil. Using perforated spoon drop dumplings, a few at a time into water. When they rise to surface, cook for 4 -5 minutes. Remove from pan and leave to drain thoroughly.
LONELY HEARTS COLUMN
We understand that Pete Sloman, drug addict and SWP bore is being questioned by Brighton Police in connection with a stolen car, He was interviewed in possession of a well known make of Soviet car, and his behaviour is now becoming something of a habit. At Southport last Conference he was arrested for being drunk and disorderly and for possession of narcotics. PS if he wants any dope Clive Martin says he's got plenty.
CREEP OF THE DAY AWARD
Goes to ROGER WILLSON-PEPPER of OPCS London for his forthright seconding of Motion 12, and we trust he will enjoy himself in Nairobi in1982 at the PSI. Special awards go to Howling Reg Williams for screeching so well yesterday and also to Stewart MacLennan for not (yet) raising any points of order.
£5 will be given to the first person to remove John Raywood's toupee without him noticing. And also, a big CLAP to John Cole of DHSS Glasgow North (DHSS in-joke.)
STOP PRESS..... Manek Dubash, arrested last night on the picket line outside the Mayor's Balls, while trying to prevent three burly officers leaving the function has been awarded PFLCPSA Hero Cadre status.
ALL THE PRESIDENTS MEN
A tense Conference is eagerly awaiting confirmation today that the peoples' choice, that triumvirate of just men Graham, Ellis and Raywood will be speedily appointed to the positions they have earned. Despite the jeers of left wing rabble, Alistair Graham has shown himself to be a tireless champion of the people. While his mother ekes out a misererable existence on supplementary benefit she can take comfort at the lot of number one son whose £18,000 income together with that of his crusading teacher wife will soon be announced.
Raywood, fresh from the triumph of an overwhelming vote of confidence at P & T Group Conference and Ellis, his I.C.E. victory firmly under his belt slept soundly in their beds last night. Other hands however are at work. Dynamic Peter Thomason unfortunately has not been able to meet Conference till now due to his sterling work with his local COCSU committee. He is of course far too modest to mention this in any way this morning. The wretched Diana Warwick's feeble attempt to wine and dine the CSEC Standing Orders Committee in the mistaken belief that they were in fact the National SOC can only be attributed to her tired and emotional state.
Meanwhile Chief Bald Eagle Ainsworth whose Rock Against Raywood badges have swamped Conference has won the Brown Tongue of the Year Award for his consistent toadying at every function he has been able to crash.
Ageing Graham-flunkey Clive Bush, despised Editor of Dead Tape, has attempted to bribe PFLCPSA supporters with free booze. Needless to say this was rejected out of hand. Those of you desperate for alcohol (Alistair Boyd please note) are advised to take the Conference Centre lift to the third floor, press the special switch to open the door then proceed to the Interpreters Room where Clive's vast array of spirit is there for the taking.
CREEP OF THE DAY AWARD
goes to Chris Gasper of DE MSC Essex for his defence of the work experience programme and the mandate breaking GSEC. Runner up is John Oliver of the MoD SEC whose rehearsal of his speeches to the assembled ducks at 6am in Southport last year, has yet to be surpassed.
George Lobo has been awarded the Hero of the Day Award in a special citation for unswerving loyalty to Manek Dubash in his hour of need. His well known public spiritedness and generosity has been extended to an offer to pay all fines arising out of the forthcoming court case.
TOP TABLE WAR FOR G.S. POST
Intense speculation is sweeping Conference as the campaign to elect our new General begins. Graham and Ellis immediately began their hate campaign against each other, locked in their bitter battle for this life-time sinecure. With Graham Banks on the Broad Left to bail him out, he faces ultimate betrayal by Charlie Elliott, whose splendid manoeuvre will enable his trusted toady Ellis to win on a Moderate ticket. Elliott has already appointed himself President-in-waiting, under the nose of the dense Ms. Womersley, whose tragic eclipse is long overdue.
Meanwhile the Inland Revenue is to be congratulated for declaring honoraria taxable. We trust that our leaders are also aware that expenses and other income are equally liable and dutifully declare the appropriate amounts (John Billouin please note). Mrs. Womersley's boast that she lives on her expenses and banks her salary doubtless merely reflects her tireless energy at the service of the people.
CREEP OF THE DAY
This coveted award today goes to Martin IGOE, incoming Chairman of DE Section, who was spotted in the Madeira Hotel the night before last in an excessively inebriated state. Speechless and short of cash, he summoned the barmaid and ordered a round of drinks for which he wouldn't pay. When the barmaid remarked on this uncomradely behaviour he replied in true Broad Left fashion by breaking her knuckles.
BRIXTON FUND SCANDAL
In order to ingratiate themselves with conference, the SWP masterminds behind the Brixton strike have ordered that the £300 residue of the unofficial strike fund be paid to Fighting Fund. Conference will of course be fooled by this cynical gesture.
RODDY ELECTION CAMPAIGN CONTINUES
Seen distributing boring Militant leaflets outside Conference yesterday, Kevin Roddy was reminded by members of the 9th Chapter Faction that the elections have finished.
DHSS NEWS - POPULAR WILL OF THE MASSES
Peg Mylward, hated Gauleiter of DHSS S. W. Middlesex is in trouble. She refused to negotiate a new facilities agreement in her branch, saying, I don't need a facilities agreement - in a few weeks time I'll be a Section Assistant Secretary (which is of course 100% facility time). But vanity comes before a fall and Ms Mylward came second from bottom in the Section poll.
THOMAS FOR PRESIDENT!
Ken Thomas's declaration that he is to stand for President in 1982 if he can pass the CA exam has astounded all. In an audacious move aimed at enhancing his pension rights, his latest book `From Militant action to Humble Petition - My Struggle' is now in its seventh reprint.
Meanwhile, back at the ranch our TATTERSALLS CORRESPONDENT reports that a shady looking spiv with pockets stuffed with fivers was spied at the Brighton Races yesterday afternoon, looking remarkably like Charlie Elliot. His marked card however was not so successful being 1.45 Jane the Joker 2,15 Alangrove Sound 2,45 Edgedale 3.15 Master Bunbury 3.45 Hedingham Boy 4.15 Never Say When (a non-runner).
While his back was turned however ALISTAIR GRAHAM AND JOHN RAYWOOD plummeted to new nadirs of cynical opportunism by donating £5.00 and £l0.00 respectively to the `MORNING STAR FIGHTING FUND' an obscure daily which will cease publication on April 30th 1982. While this desperate attempt to buy Red votes is doomed, a vicious rumour is circulating that Raywood is denying his Roman Catholicism.
The KNIGHTS OF ST. COLUMBA will doubtless end this evil smear, bearing in mind the usual fate for apostates.
INTERNATIONAL YEAR OF THE DISABLED
Those of you who wish to make a real contribution are invited to donate to the flag seller at Conference, our dear chum Peter Arnott, the DAYLIES National full-time official, who would only be too happy to talk to anyone who can recognize or even remember him.
While JOHN FILBY DE LEEDS MSC the ageing Yorkshire Stalinist received another humiliating rebuff from May MacDonald, the belle of the Conservative Party at the Daylight Ball on Wednesday Night. Filby can be seen asleep in the observers gallery most afternoons, but as his fiftieth birthday is tomorrow one cannot be too harsh. It has been noticed that Ian Leadem, also from the DE Section has been called into debate more times than any other DE delegate. This is attributed to his donation of half his expenses to Dame Losinska in an effort to be nominated for the NEC on any list.
ALL OF US HAVE BEEN pleased and proud to see the concern of the local Constabulary in our Conference, This, however, is not due to their just interest in exotic cheroots, but follows the discovery on Monday of a plastic bag full of toy coshes found in the vicinity by Julian Losinski, the famed Daylight artist. Len Lever, showing no interest in the matter, left it to Julian to report it to his mother, who rightly informed the forces of law and order, mindful of the Red riff-raff which periodically fill the cheap seats at Conference. (BLAKE BAKER please note for future articles - see you in the Popinjay next week). Thanks, Julian, but please return the coshes to DIANE WARWICK, who has dutifully supplied us with tons of dirt on her enemies, none of which we have bothered to print.
HERO OF THE WEEK
GOES OF COURSE TO Pat Byrne, DHSS Militant supremo, whose brilliant Kate Losinska mask operation has had us all in stitches all week, and reflects the more mature approach being demonstrated by Militant supporters and readers throughout the world.
CREEP OF THE DAY
must go to Barry Reamsbottom, for daring to presume that we would mention him in the first place, and the coveted
CREEP OF THE WEEK
has been won by Stuart MacClennan, because he has been so bloody quiet during debate.
John Billouin and Marion Chambers, and the best of luck with your Social Democratic Group, and to all the boys in the LUDOWEGO WOJSKA POLSKIEGO, without whose help none of this would have been possible. Tough luck, Peter SLOMAN, for getting expelled from the Socialist Workers Party for carrying our banner on Thursday's demonstration. This has nothing to do with the fact that REDDER TAPE ran out of ink half way through printing one of their boring unreadable leaflets.
And finally, an au revoir to RAY SHUTTLEWORTH, and we will see you again at the PSI in Singapore, and don't forget to visit the SEAFAYRE fish restaurant, owned by the Mayor of Brighton, as part of our struggle to keep down the rates.
PLEASE COMPLETE THE ATTACHED FORM AND RETURN IT TO BATTLE GROUP (LONDON) -
I fully support the aims and work of the PFLCPSA, and wish to become a supporter.
BYE BYE CONFERENCE, SEE YOU NEXT YEAR
ONE STRUGGLE! ONE FIGHT!
The Daily TELEGRAPH
In all the spectrum of Trotskyist activity, however, no better example is provided than by the 250,000-strong Civil and Public Services Association, the middle-grade and largest Civil Service union. A target for all groups, it faces crucial elections next month (April 16).
The CPS A has long been the battlefield of a vicious fight between moderates, led by Mrs. Kate Losinska, now challenged by Mr. Kevin Roddy, a Trotskyist from the Department of Health and Social Security, and the `Broad Left' alliance of Trotskyists, Communists and fellow-travellers.
Control of the CPSA, representing control of the cogwheels of government, would be a spanner aimed at the whole machinery of the State, vide the latest wages strikes. The Broad Left, those uneasy bedfellows, publish `Redder Tape', counterpart to the official union journal `Red Tape'. Militant also publishes special issues aimed at CPSA members.
Fair enough, it might be thought, all part of the cut-and-thrust. But there is a department of dirtier tricks. One document distributed at the union s recent special pay conference was in the names of Mrs. Losinska and Mr. Charlie Elliott, Bradford vice president and moderate leader. It was stated to be a forgery.
Obscene cartoons of Mrs. Losinska have been drawn and distributed. I have a series of internal bulletins for CPSA members headed:
`Popular Front for the Liberation of the CPSA (Unified Command Council)', `Communiqué of the South Midlands Brigade' or `Communiqué from the Forward Battle Group Valkyrie'. Apart from redolence of Arab propaganda, they are a weak imitation of satirical publications and under the guise of thinly disguised pseudonyms, make personal references of the utmost scurrility to moderate CPSA officials. In the internal CPSA war, nothing is barred.
One activist is believed to be an Arab supporting the PLO. Last May a curious incident occurred at the end of the CPSA conference in Southport. Mrs. Losinska was called by local police to identify three bags apparently forgotten in the delegates' car park, believed to be union property. On being opened, they were found by police to contain Arab documents, plastic guns and much cash. This incident has been discussed at the highest level in Whitehall.
Nor is this all. Last summer, the CPSA became involved in the stormy dispute at Brixton Job Centre over sacking of two SWP members. Mr. Ken Thomas, general secretary, subsequently described the action as a `calculated and callous exploitation of a trade union issue by a small faction'. He also maintained that the SWP had almost completely taken over control of the Brixton dispute, and its activists `bamboozled money out of our members and branches, trading cheaply on trade union loyalty'. I also have an SWP national committee document full of doubt and self-criticism last summer over past and future tactics in the CPSA against moderate successes.
Recently, the CPSA moderate leadership has discovered that a large number of its sectional publications, of which I have copies, are being printed by Cambridge Heath Press, printers and publishers of `Militant'. They include `Aviation Organiser', `Viewpoint' for the DHSS, `New Environment' for the Environment Department, `Voice' for the Inland Revenue and `Union Voice' for the Land Registry.
`Militant' printers are able to tender cheaply for such work because of cheap or free labour, or employees paying back a tithe on their wages. But in giving them the work the CPSA is effectively subsidising the Trotskyist movement.
CPSA members, average age under 30, should, it might be thought, wake up to the fact that they are being manipulated before next month's elections. But this union only provides one prime example of subversive Trotskyist activity through much, if not all, of the British trade union movement.
Subversive? Trotskyist? Wot drugs he on? Ed. Anyway, the truth about the 3 bags is even stranger.....perhaps one day.....