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ROUND AND ABOUT
by Judas Iscariot - DECEMBER 2001

The Christmas ritual has begun. 'Tis the season to be jolly. Most of us are hanging up our socks and stockings in the hope that Santa will answer our prayers for Christmas. But in the darkened cellars of Falconcrest others are whetting their knives for another ritual, the factional midwinter sacrifice and topping the victim wish-list is Stuart CURRIE - at least as far as the Moderati are concerned.

Mr BLOBBY is in all sorts of trouble following his bungling of the Pathfinder affair. BUNTER'S tactless sell-out strategy on the Disputes Committee and the NEC has stirred up a hornet's nest amongst the Moderati rank-and-file. Some are asking whether it was really necessary to line-up with CHURCHYARD and LANNING over the strike after it became clear that ME FIRST and LUNITY were going to carry on the fight. Others are questioning FATMAN'S self-appointed role as "Leader" of the National Moderate Group.

FATTY started styling himself "Leader" on his boring website last summer following BARRY'S de facto retirement. Needless to say none of the Moderati cannon fodder were consulted. In fact the Mods haven't had a full group conference since KATE LOSINSKA'S days. KATIE presided over a number of bickering and ambitious rivals who formed her kitchen cabinet. When she left MARION CHAMBERS and RAMSBLADDER effectively shared power - the Great Scot and his Jockocracy concentrated on the manipulation of the full-time officers while MARION covered the vote-baggers in the field.

For what it's worth CURRIE is "Leader" - but only of the Moderate group on the NEC, elected on the Darwinian principle of survival of the fattest. Whether he's fit to lead the Mods electoral machine is now being seriously put in doubt. Many recall that way back in CPSA days he couldn't hack it as Deputy Secretary of BATUS and had to be shipped back to Jockoland under the cover of a family illness. Once he got back to Edinburgh the BA branch structure was changed to ensure that he and the incumbent CHARLATAN NEC member COUNT KOWALSKI could both be elected without branch limitations. His seamless move into full-time facilities in the Scottish Office was then orchestrated by Barry's cronies regardless of his lack of ability - recently demonstrated by the fact that he recently FAILED the EO exam in the Scottish Executive.

BUNTER is trying to avert disaster by trying to pull a coup in Inland Revenue. He's been assiduously courting LES PRIESTLEY to try and woo him into the Moderati camp. PRIESTLEY needs all the help he can get. Though he's been promised ME FIRST support for his bid for the Presidency next year he knows that some senior UNDYMEN would prefer another candidate.

Though technically under the ME FIRST whip on the NEC, LES broke ranks to vote with the Mods over the Pathfinder dispute. It's no coincidence that chief Moderati enforcer MARTIN BOYLE was chief guest at the old git's stag night.

PRIESTLEY'S hold over the right in Inland Revenue hinges on his position as Group Chair. But his support - largely from the old Mainstream crowd - is by no means assured. His ruling at the IR Group SDC not to discuss pay the week after the Board imposed the pay offer enraged many of his erstwhile supporters.

Some ME FISTERS in the Revenue are openly saying that poor old Les is out of touch with the members and that a new broom is needed to head off the TROT challenge.

Who could that be? That remains a ME FIRST secret. What isn't that they are rushing to mop up as much as they can from the rapidly disintegrating SECRET LEFT. UNITY, almost exclusively high-caste former communists, has been talking to LUNITY to agree a common platform in the new DWP while their full-timers are working hand-in-glove with the Undymen. They still dream of being behind-the-scenes string-pullers in both factions. LORD FLICK just wants their votes.

Meantime another dubious faction has emerged within the Revenue misleadingly called "Progress" and run by a nonentity called DAMIAN CARR. It largely consists of a pompous web-site, which to be fair is a considerable improvement on his last effort - the indescribably boring "Interesting Times" which died the death two years ago due to lack of support. "Progress" is reputed to have the support of at least one disaffected Moderate Revenue full-timer but CARR should beware - anything associated with JASON DROSS is doomed to failure.