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ROUND AND ABOUT
by Judas Iscariot
- Late February 2003

BREAKING NEWS 28/02/03 BALLOT RESULT

YES, YES, YES

1) NEC structure: Yes 40,727 No 9,372

2) Annual NEC elections: Yes 31,322 No 18,926

3) Annual Conference: Yes 28,190 No 22,053

Back to Round and About

It’s been a busy February for all and sundry. We’ve been given a chance at last to dump our ghastly constitution foisted on us as part of the merger deal. We’ve watched spellbound as the great dress code diktat unravels at the Employment Tribunal hearing. And we’ve seen some of our onetime would-be leaders make fools of themselves as usual.

So step forward STUART COLLINS, one-time star of the long forgotten BL’84 faction in CPSA, now with his nose to the grindstone in DWP. The ex-BL shagger turned Blairite Labour crawler, currently MAYOR OF CROYDON, was reduced to appearing on the boring breakfast TV KILROY programme this month. The topic was appropriately “people who can’t find love”…

And remember KALI MOUNTFORD, CPSA’s answer to Germaine Greer? KALI, the constant companion of BL’84’s tame Trot leader IAN LEEDHAM, was the scourge of RAMSBLADDER and the darling of the other Trot harpies in CPSA in those days. But she soon found better pickings in her local Labour Party, got on the A-list and was returned to Parliament in 1997 as the Honourable Member for Colne Valley in Huddersfield. It didn’t take this BLAIR’S BABE long to dump her old Trot rhetoric. This week she dutifully backed the Government’s war against Iraq opposing the rebel backbench amendment supported by 121 Labour MPs and 78 others. You can see her name in the Daily Mirror’s ROLL OF DISHONOUR, published on page 4 on the 27th February.

How the mighty are fallen – or not so mighty as far as our union is concerned.

At least CHRIS FORD still keeps up the fight…but mostly against his comrades in the LEFT UNITY camp. CHRIS, you will recall, is up on a disciplinary - charged with harassing scabs whilst on picket duty during the Pathfinder strike. He’s now been bleating that PCS VIEW is ignoring his struggle against victimisation. In fact there has been some coverage in the magazine but as one of the LUNITY members of the editorial board has pointed out, the major problem is that FRAUD has provided little or no information about his case for them to report. No-one can complain about CHRIS not bothering to read the rag in the first place – after-all who does? But he surely should spend more time telling us about his struggle instead of banging on and on about the campaigns of the tiny TROT group he currently belongs to. Incidentally, one of these campaigns is a call to boycott the goods of American imperialism. The FRIEND OF THE UKRAINE could make a start himself by changing his own e-mail account, which is AMERICA ON-LINE (AOL), part of the AOL Time-Warner, Bush-loving conglomerate and nerds paradise. Never mind CHRIS, a drop of BUCKFAST should console you…

Meanwhile back at FALCONCREST everyone is waiting with bated breath for the outcome of the membership ballots. The Moderati are in complete disarray over the prospect of fresh elections this year if the proposals are carried. They haven’t sorted out their list nor have they agreed on who should challenge Ms GODRICH for the Presidency either. PAULINE ABRAMS is being strongly backed but she is too lazy to fight for her corner against others who are now arguing in favour of LES PRIESTLEY. The MAD MONK’s following in Inland Revenue, they claim, is far greater than the Uncle Tom vote PAULINE usually bags. Furthermore, LES would get the high-caste male chauvinist pig vote in a straight contest with GODRICH.

In the meantime LORD UNDY has at last got “PCS DEMOCRATS” on the road. Though at the moment all this consists of is a pretty boring website carrying stale news of their inaugural meeting first reported by the PFL many weeks ago. The UNDERLINGS are now supporting the demand for a democratic constitution ignoring the fact that the one we were lumbered with was largely drawn up by NOSFERUNDY in the first place. If you want to get the gist of what Herr Flick thinks is “democratic” have a look at the constitution he drew up for his old HSE branch. This remarkable piece of affirmative action does away with the tedious chore of AGMs and gives the BEC all power to make decisions concerning the branch. It is indeed a constitution BENITO MUSSOLINI would be proud of…

The much vaunted QC investigation into alleged electoral malpractices by the MODERATI found – nobody to blame, which surprises - nobody. Another waste of members subs – The PFLCPSA told you the outcome at Conference last year.

So, so long TERRY ADAMS, who threw in the towel this month to really spend more time with his new family…and a belated bibi to RICHARD WIGLEY, who has retired prematurely on health grounds. Don’t worry though, JOHN McCREADIE is still hanging on, saying he wants to stay on at Falconcrest at least until the next GS elections…though this might only be a matter of weeks.