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ROUND AND ABOUT
by Judas Iscariot 5th July 2002

SPIN WARS

The Ancient Gauls, the ancestors of the modern French, were known for their cunning and ferocity. When they went on the warpath their tribal leaders burnt their bridges behind them to ensure that there would be no retreat. Or so Caesar tells us.

What the ordinary Gaul in the street thought about all this we will never know. What we do know is that the latter-day Obelix' s (who you will remember was large of girth and somewhat dim), otherwise known as the Moderati ,are well aware that their chief, RAMSBLADDER, has crossed the Rubicon in his struggle to remain at the helm of our mighty union.

So far the skirmishes have been on the propaganda front and in this information war the Mods have lost considerable ground. BARRY no doubt hoped for a barrage of favourable comment from his largely imaginary chums in the media. All he's got is some piss-poor copy from the SCUM and the DAILY MAIL, and neither of those is picking up on the pathetic bleatings by the Mods of racism and threats of violence against them. At Falconcrest the staff are refusing to send BARRY'S ravings out, officially because they are unsure of his authority but secretly because they loathe him. And while this has also applied to Messrs GODRICH and SERWOTKA, they can rely on the well-oiled TROT machine to get their views across in other ways.

So the Moderati spin machine has at last gone into action. CURRIE has been kicked into action and the Mod Website's been updated - albeit with a press release over a month old and a tirade about the June NEC fiasco. The GREAT SCOT has personally sent a members circular to all and sundry in an effort to break out of the information blockade that surrounds his own bunker in Falconcrest and another issue of the union rag promises to be packed with pro-Moderati propaganda.

The issuing of MB/7/02, which did not emanate from Falconcrest, is of particular interest: it used the current membership details (or as up to date as it usually is) for the mailing. Barry could argue that he was illegally prevented from using the proper channels to issue what he sees as a legitimate mailing, and therefore needed access to the database. Only the cynical would suggest that this means the MODs have got their greasy hands on a shiny new membership list.

Behind the scenes the Mods are trying to outflank the Trots with a whisper campaign purporting to come from members wanting to leave PCS in favour of UNISON. Some thought's gone into this. The Jockocracy know that the dregs of UNITY and some of the "PCS Friends" have made contact with the similarly minded in UNISON. But the rumour the Mods are spreading, using fake names on the rank-and-file Websites, is that droves are ready to jump ship now. Well, pigs might fly but it has already taken up some precious campaigning time away from the Underlings and Lunity activists who have been forced to argue against this essentially bogus claim.

They've even managed to organise one pro-BARRY members meeting, though this pales into insignificance compared to the 300-plus organised by the Assorted Trots across the country over the past four weeks. And its impact on membership opinion has been equally negligible.

Well, the Mods publicly say, at the end of the day what counts is the Court's ruling. But behind closed doors the unease and concern at the tactics of NAPOLEON and the Jockocracy is becoming increasingly vocal. They won't break ranks now, there's too much at stake. One or two minions have defected but they were on their way out anyway and their views count for little amongst the Moderati faithful. What worries those not in the chosen circle of BOYLE, McCANN and McINTYRE is what comes later. If BARRY loses it will be a disaster. If he wins the prospect is almost equally grim.

For the first time the Mods are facing a coalition of everyone who hates BARRY ranging from the die-hard TROTS and the high-caste REDS in Unity - officially disbanded but still operating as a secret society to UNDY'S Me Firsters and everyone else BARRY has trodden on over the decades. They know what will happen if the GREAT SCOT wins. He told them at the last NEC. That's why the portly LANNING, not known for his energy and drive, has been stomping up and down the country banging SERWOTKA'S drum. He'll be the first to go if BARRY wins, closely followed by REILLY and a few others to boot. LANNING and his "PCS Friends" also know that the Mods are going to move on the election of all senior full-time officer posts - a move which will be also backed by the TROTS. LANNING doubtless hopes that when the fateful day comes he will be able to rely on LUNITY support as a payback for joining the Barry Must Go Campaign.

Unfortunately for them the TROTS are not known for their loyalty to others, least of all to clapped-out old time-servers like LANNING & Co. as HUGH found out to his cost at the last GS election.

LORD UNDY is playing a deeper game. He's come out fighting to remain at the head of the Me Fister campaign knowing that if he doesn't keep a high profile the whole faction with the exception of the decidedly maverick Inland Revenue brigade will fall asunder. NOSFERUNDY hates RAMSBLADDER and wants him out but he doesn't want to be swept up by the TROT agenda which could follow.

So far UNDY'S attempts to moderate LUNITY'S demands have been confined to the running of the current campaign. And he's succeeded in damping down the wild men of the left arguing that rent-a-mob actions like the occupation of Falconcrest (which would have almost certainly happened in CPSA days) are put on freeze for fear of frightening away the high-caste constituency the Underlings are wooing.

MAREK and Madame GODRICH are likewise keeping close counsel. The Mods would dearly love to know what they intend to do if Barry wins. But they can guess. They fear a further 18 months of discontent starting with a campaign in favour of a rules revision conference, which will have to go to members ballot if and when an NEC meeting goes beyond the minutes and standing orders. Worst is to come. They anticipate a massive campaign calling for a special conference if Barry comes up trumps in Court. If enough branches can pass suitably worded motions it will have to go to the MOD-dominated NEC which will no doubt veto it leading to another battle in the Courts. All this in the run-up to elections which must take place in 2004.

That's if BARRY wins. If he loses all bets are off and not just for the Jockocracy.