gold eagle












by Judas Iscariot - July 1999

McCanngate continues to exercise the great minds at HQ. Marion and Curries' rant to The Scotsman denouncing RED fanatic Reilly so infuriated the Tufty Club on the NEC that they attempted to pass a censure motion on the pair for bringing the Union into disrepute. Our heroes were excluded from the room for the debate, but allowed back in to vote - which we think is only fair. The motion went down the Swanee by a not inconsiderable margin - the process of kicking has-beens seeming to have died with CPSA - and Currie took the opportunity to confirm with El Presidente that whistleblowing was now OK.

That being said, the latest half page spread in the Scotsman (7/7/99) puffing McCann and slagging off Reilly is attributed to "one union source" but does at least convey an approximation of the real story (see Judas passim). McCanny is suing under Scottish Law, claiming £150,000 (3 tanker loads of lager, should last till the millennium) in the Court of Sessions, and is also taking the union to an IT. Barry is quoted as saying, "We will be vigorously defending the executive's view that his contract has not been breached." Using his corporate mask in this way allows the great man to keep his true feelings in check.

Sheldon, the alternative GS, thinks it's all a storm in a teacup - after all, wasn't Reilly his DGS for 8 years - and endearingly, doesn't believe that politics has anything to do with it. The Scotsman drones on about this "potentially damaging internal dispute, affecting the highest echelons of the union" without elaboration other than to point up traditional rivalry between Glasgow (McCann) and Edinburgh (Reilly), but the situation does hide some delicious side effects.

Current President Peter Donnellan always made it clear that he was only going to do a single term cos it would otherwise interfere with his chosen career of overpaid MANDARIN. He is now qualifying this by saying he will make the ultimate sacrifice and stay on (surely, "stand for re-election, ed) if the Union is engaged fighting any Court case at the time. When Sheldon retires in about 18 months, the REDS and the TUFTY CLUB want Ramsbladder to stand down and offer himself for re-election. Barry has of course considered this but has decided that the interests of the members would best be served if he continues to shoulder the burden for another 20 years. But will Sheldon go? He was never a Civil Servant and will retire on a measly COCSU pension at age 55. The PCS rules allow for retirement at 60, so another 5 years on a new contract as Bladder's helpmate and comrade-in-arms might be just the ticket. Couldn't happen? Ask his mate Eddie Reilly.

Even Terry Adams is having second thoughts about his impending retirement at 55, although he has to take into account that the new contracts allow the NEC to sack Assistant Secretaries. Nobody quite knows when Marion and her pet Popplewell are due to go, but they are rarely seen at FALCONCREST due mainly to the withdrawal of their exes by an ungrateful NEC. Chambers now works from her home in Watford and Carol doesn't.

Leading TROTS Stella Dennis and Martin Moss have painted themselves into a corner. Keen to keep the Boss class out of their branch, they amended their constitution to exclude executive grades, had it passed by an all members meeting and ratified by the NEC. So far so proletarian, until they passed the promotion board to become (hushed whisper) Executive Officers. Of course they still wanted to be Chair and Sec, of course the members still wanted them to represent them, etc. etc, and of course they were told "Tough - time to grow up and join the bosses constituency." where they stand little chance of getting even a local stewards job unless someone retires or dies.

Conversely, RED Bacon has also suffered a setback. His Trot clique were outspoken in their support for the CPSA/PTC merger and he duly put forward a motion to his branch to merge with their corresponding executive constituency. Not only did his branch throw his motion out; they trumped it by passing a censure motion against him, accusing him of selling out.

And so it goes on. In the BA in London, Socialist Wanker Phil Pardoe's (Thames) executive branch has been in talks with ex-Militant Rob Williams (Inner London South clerical) regarding a partial merger. Partial because the geographical area covered by Pardoes executive constituency is also partially covered by Sir Woy d'Lewis' (S W Thames) clerical constituency, and nobody wants the snuff stained follower of fashion. Perhaps they should take more account of his 400 odd very useful votes. Alas poor Rob, he and his underling went to Pardoes BEC and convinced them of the merits of such a partial merger. He did not do quite such a good job with his own BEC, which consists of 6 members. He lost the vote 4 - 2.

News reaches us that former Broad Left vice-presidential candidate Ann Jarvis has got another promotion and is now in charge of that proletarian utopia "New Deal" in the North West. Sounds of rotation have been heard emanating from Highgate Cemetery, and have you noticed that every crackpot employment scheme dreamt up by successive governments always seems to have an ex-ES section chair at its helm.

Leo Brightley has left to become a Full Time Officer for the British Dental Association and Andy Case has left to join some building society Staff Association. That's 2 of the Dim Left's leading lights leaving to join non-aligned unions. Agent Headbanger has similarly gone to join yet another building society union and as soon as Col Islam and Agent Bronk turned up at his leaving do, in true Popular Front style, he did a runner.

At FALCONCREST the Assistant Secretaries pay dispute gets more confused. Seeking to offer an explanation, Lanning had them all issued with a circular explaining how much better off they would be. Unfortunately, because they all have different allowances to be taken into consideration, each calculation is unique, and Poo Bah had sent them all the one which related to Jayson Sloss. It came as a shock to many impoverished ASes to discover the nice little earner that Dross had secured for himself. Also, prior to the settlement, the ASes were being paid on the old PTC scale and were told that adjustments would be made. FALCONCREST now wants these adjustments made, which means that many ex-CPSA ASes having to pay money back, which they are refusing to do on the argument that the settlement is staged and anyway, they shouldn't be worse off after a pay settlement, particularly from a trades union.