gold eagle












By Judas Iscariot - October 2004

The troops are gearing up for the next offensive in the war of attrition that clearly has only just begun. The strike looks set to inflict another telling blow against the Management lines but it won’t win the war – the war that can only be won when one side’s nerve cracks.

On the LUNITY front the line remains solid but BIFFA BRYANT has been cashiered for striking a fellow officer and MACDONALD is facing a possible court martial for striking an enlisted man in an unseemly fracas outside Chateaux Falconcrest. “CHARLIE”, as he is known to his diminishing band of friends, has also attempted to desert several times, much to the dismay of his comrades in the front-line trenches, but his attempts to get a juicy full-time job miles away from the fighting have, so far, thankfully failed.

No doubt the Gods ensured that CHARLIE would get into hot water in the one spot of fighting he has recently indulged in. The injured party, one HOWARD FULLER, is a weirdo who claims he is related to JUDGE DREDD (a comic-book character). DREDD claims his cap was knocked off during a lunch-time exchange of views with SOCIALIST CARCASE dregs MACDONALD, CHRIS FRAUD (late of this union) and McVITTY outside the imposing gates of FALCONCREST (see Judas passim).

HOWARD has submitted a complaint to Mark Serwotka. Demanding that FRAUD be banned from PCS premises and Conferences etc. He’s also raised Rule 10 against MCVITTY of the AWL (Association of Wankers Liberty – the General Secretary’s favoured TROT group). We understand MCVITTY has been charged by Management for erm… harrasment and intimidation. We are sure there is no connection.

The Rule 10 complaint is to be heard by the NEC and an investigation to go ahead. JOHN McINALLY, who described the CARCASE as “GANGSTERS”, is backing DREDD which is usually the kiss of death. This time HOWARD may be lucky. LUNITY grandees are sick and tired of the antics of the likes of CHARLIE and LEE ROCK that have, in their opinion, undermined LUNITY’S position in DWP. They also don’t like deserters. LEE and CHARLIE share a flat soon to be joined by the FRIEND OF THE UKRAINE himself, the great and rich (on his pay-off bunce) CHRIS FRAUD. On being told the news JANICE GODRICH told all and sundry that she wouldn’t be going round to dinner!

Jeanne Rickards, husband of Caucus leading light John, has campaigned along with PCS policy against PDS but has herself fully cooperated because she is retiring next year. So that's all right then. John shrugs his shoulders when asked about it - but it certainly persuaded more people to cross picket lines last time out and there is very bad feeling about it in Bath and Bristol, many members think she should do the honourable thing.

On the RIGHT WING the IR GANG OF FOUR (PRIESTLEY, WILDE, STEEL & NOBODY) are flapping around in the absence of LES who is still hobbling around with hip replacement surgery. They’ve still to agree a name for the new alliance with the former Moderati ANTI-BUNTERITES – though given the turgid suggestions so far that’s not surprising. So they’ve done nothing apart from the hypocritical sniping at the LUNITY full-time appointments (all to their chosen sons and daughters – a good old factional tradition of CPSA, the “Society” and the Revenue) and some feeble remarks to the effect that the Government would reach a reasonable settlement if it wasn’t for the TROTS in charge.

JAKE THE RAKE has put his name down for the NO post that STELLA DENNIS is going to get in the belief that he’s making some sort of point. The other also-rans are:





As for poor old “peace at any price” CURRIE, the “leader” of the Moderates, has been deserted by all except McCANN. He’s consoling himself in the arms of a new girlfriend and looking forward to a big redundancy cheque.

 It’s a long, long trail a winding…one PAT “FAT” RIVERS took a long time ago. FAT, who readers may remember was two of the NEWCASTLE 8, said goodbye to GEORDIELAND in The Bodega pub on 7 th September. PAT is off to live in Warrington where her daughter Sarah resides (much to the horror of son-in-law Mark who left Warrington DWP to join the PLODS in Manchester . Methinks he may be volunteering for extra duties to keep out of sight of his mother in law.

The usual old has-beens turned up including ALAN MAUGHAN another of the Mendicant TOON 8. Maughan who left DWP last year is now a lecturer in computer studies at Northumbria University . With BARRINGTON FUGE (Mrs Stella Dennis) now on juicy secondment to PCS it leaves only one of the 8 still working in the Civil Service. Can you guess who it is?

IT’S OUR OLD CHUM PETER MAHONY, still working in Caseworker in between putting on bets for MCHUGH at lunchtimes.

And the rest?

B Fuge -- PCS secondment

D. Purvis -- retired

D Robson -- living in a run-down hotel in South Shields

T Martin -- Dinner lady by day Irish Dancer by night.

S Donnachie -- head of Staff training at Peterborough College (Standards must have dropped)

A Maughan -- as above

P Rivers -- as Above

Other onetime RED firebrands have been luckier. MENDICANT Supremo TERRY ADAMS is now ensconced in his charming cottage near Toulon in the south of France . It is rumoured that JOHN McGREEDY will join him there next year when he retires.

Terry lives with Debbie his second, or is it his third wife? As there is not much on Frog telly this has resulted in Debbie expecting her second child. Terry who is knocking on 60 can certainly show one or two younger men a thing or two!! Then again VIAGRA can be had without prescription in France . Between collecting his bumper pension TERRY tills the land and makes his own wine, however I bet his overalls are still by Armani!!

Meanwhile back at FALCONCREST rumour has it that Mr 'Narcissistic' VENES has been using any underhand means, through his friends, to appoint female staff to organising, sleeping with them and then doing anything he can to rid himself of their presence.

Apparently there have been four known women. Not so long ago he was up on disciplinary charges for using a PCS flat to conduct his “affairs”. Moreover he was recently caught on a desk at work in a compromising position with his latest.

His last, after a conference encounter, recently had her contract terminated

The one before was transferred to another department. And the latest is still very close to him and looking forward to a full time job.

 Oderint dum metuant

Let them hate us, so long as they fear us

Lucius Accius

Roman tragic dramatist (c140 BC)